13 THINGS IN 13 YEARS|SELF LOVE SERIES

13 THINGS IN 13 YEARS|SELF LOVE SERIES

Heyyy

So this is a post that I’ve been wanting to do for a while, I’ve been doing a lot of self discovery lately and now felt like a good time to do a little advice post😊

1. FITTING IN ISN’T ALWAYS GOOD

As I get older, I’ve been noticing that a lot of people who I used to be close friends with are making choices that I don’t agree with. Being a teenager is hard and right now I’m at a point in my life where I really couldn’t care less about what other people are doing. Seeing a psychologist and getting medication and help for my depression and mood lability has really helped me see that life is worth living. Right now I’m too focused on improving myself and working towards my goals to be caught up in everybody else.Fitting in isn’t always the right thing.

2. TRUST YOUR GUT

I’m going to be straight with you and tell you that over the past 5 years I’ve gotten into a fair amount of trouble, but the truth is that I wouldn’t be where I am today if I hadn’t taken the chances that I did. Trust yourself.

3.PAVE YOUR OWN PATH

This is something I think almost everyone can relate to. You know what you want and everyone around you has their own ideas about what you should be doing with your life and it can be really difficult if you feel like you’re not being supported. If you have a dream or a goal then don’t let other people determine whether or not you try working towards it.

4. DON’T BE AFRAID TO REACH OUT

I still remember the first day I reached out to my favourite blogger and rolemodel Claire Cramphorn.  It was the first time I’d ever talked to another blogger and it was the best thing I ever could have done for myself. Not only did I do my first collab Girl Talk with Claire but I made a best friend in the process.Don’t be afraid to a) ask for help b) reach out to a blogger you admire or c) market/advertise your blog on social media.

5.MAKE YOURSELF YOUR EVERYTHING

Lately I’ve been thinking about how to some people my life would seem boring. I don’t go out much, I’ve somehow managed to become socially awkward and I prefer being alone. Most of my time is spent blogging, writing or taking photos in my room all whilst dancing to Lil Xan. But after 21 days of self discovery I’ve started loving myself again and I’ve decided to stop finding myself and finding acceptance in others and start loving and accepting myself first.

6.SELF NURTURE IS KEY

I recently learn that there is a big difference between self care and self nurturance. Self care refers to “… any necessary human regulatory function which is under individual control, deliberate and self-initiated.”In other words it’s pretty much hygiene. Self nurturance however refers to the act of loving and taking care of oneself. In short, self nurturance is self-love.  I used to put everybody’s needs above my own and I ended up stressed and unhappy because I had been way to involved with other people’s well-being that I had forgotten to nurture and love myself.

I’ll leave a list of self nurturance ideas below for those of you who are interested.

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7.YOU NEED TO KNOW WHEN TO THROW PUNCHES AND WHEN TO ROLL WITH THEM

So…I’m notorious for being dramatic,having hectic mood swings and anger management issues-a dangerous combination. I also have very strong views on EVERYTHING and I believe things should happen a certain way and 99.9% of the time my way is the best way. I’ve suffered through countless group projects and it’s taught me two things a) group projects suck and b) you need to know when to throw punches and when to roll with them. I am extremely quick to voice my opinion about everything and I genuinely fear for people who get on my bad side. Over the past five years of my life I’ve learnt just how consequential that can be. Over the past year or so I’ve been trying to find the balance between being opinionated and my mood swings, which hasn’t been easy as I get angered quickly but I’m slowly learning that sometimes it’s better to let karma handle things. But be warned if karma doesn’t handle you: I will.

8.PASSION PROJECTS CHANGE EVERYTHING

DID YOU KNOW?

Seventeen Wishes started out as a passion project

Seventeen Wishes started because I was bored. Seventeen Wishes is what it is today because my passion fuelled something so much bigger. Whether it be art, writing, athletics or even blogging finding something your passionate changes your life completely. Trying new things is incredibly important and so is taking a chance on your ‘passion project’ it could change the game completely.

9.GOALS.GOALS.GOALS

Goals are necessary for success and happiness. Ever since I was little I would make lists, to do lists, things that make me happy lists. You name it, I had a list for everything. Setting goals not only helped me to stay motivated but it’s kept me from straying off the path I’ve set for myself. There are times when I’ve seen people on Instagram doing things that I don’t agree with, and just to be clear I’m not saying this to be rude or mean in any way. But the question that has constantly bounced itself around my mind when seeing this is ‘How could this possibly be helping someone achieve their goals?’. Now I’m not saying there is anything wrong with having fun but to me when I see people doing certain things I can’t help but think… ‘Why?’

I strongly believe that if you know the goals you have for yourself you’re a lot less likely to stray off the path of achieving your goals plus there is nothing more satisfying than achieving a goal you’ve worked hard for.

10.EDUCATE YOURSELF

This is one of the most important and rewarding things you can do for yourself. I love learning. I love reading and watching TED TALKS and talking about things that need to be talked about and not shying away from controversy. I feel like it’s one of the main reasons I talk (not in a bad way) and feel older than I am constantly. I’ve been told since I was about 5 years old that I was incredibly mature.When I was 5 my teacher told my mum I had the reading ability of a 16 year old. And it’s literally an integrated part of me. I honestly believe that learning is such an amazing thing and I would not be the person I am today without it.

11.OWN THAT SH*T

I’m going brutally honest with you and tell you that this year my self confidence was at an all time low. I became  more depressed and I isolated myself from everyone and then I stopped talking, to tell you the truth the day I stopped talking was the day I realised that I truly had lost myself these past few months. And I’m not going to lie to you and tell you that it magically fixed itself overnight, it took therapy and medication and an unforgettable group of people to gain my confidence back. And you can bet your ass that it’s back for good. Nothing changes if you don’t believe in yourself.

NEWS FLASH!

You are a badass and it’s time for you to own that sh*t!

12.DANCE PARTIES ARE NECESSARY AND SO IS SPOILING YOURSELF

Congratulations on owning that sh*t. I’m proud of you now go dance to your favourite song because I’m proud. You deserve to spoil yourself every once in a while. Go on, turn that Lil Xan song up, we both know you want to.

13.SOMETIMES YOU FIND FAMILY IN THE PEOPLE YOU CALL YOUR FRIENDS

Truth be told, I’ve found family in the people I call my friends. I’ve found family in the blogging community and I’ve found family in my rolemodels. They’ve been there for me for everything and supported me and given me advice and I’m so grateful to have my friends and the people in the blogging community and I’m so grateful that I can call them family because they’ve always treated me like I was.

I hope you enjoyed this post because I had so much fun writing and I did take a dancing break which was extremely fun.

Love you 

“I no longer force things.

What flows, flows

What crashes,crashes

I only have space and energy

for the things that are meant for me”

xxxChips

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DEAR YOUNGER SELF

DEAR YOUNGER SELF

A letter to a little girl before she got help

Dear Chips

I know it’s hard. And I know you feel like giving up but my darling, don’t. I know that you feel like nobody understands you but there will come a time a few months from now when you get the help you need and the help you deserve.

A lot of people will complain about your behaviour and I know for a fact that you really don’t care about it and for that I am truly proud of you because those people are wrong.

And even though you’ve gotten into tons of trouble these past 5 years and you’ve been hurt a lot and you constantly feel like you’re drowning baby girl believe me when I say the things that were keeping you down all this time will not go away. You have the strength and you have always had the strength to fight them off,baby girl believe me when I say your pain will fuel the passion and the fire inside you.

You are the whole damn fire.You will always and always have been nothing but the whole damn fire.

 

Do not mistake the glint in my eyes for sparks. I am the whole damn fire

-C.R.L

You will meet people who make you sad and you will meet people who make you happy. You will meet an amazing guy and he’s going to be your best friend for a very long time, you’re going to fall in love and it’s going to be one of the best things that’ll ever happen to you. It’s going to teach you how to be humble and patient and kind and have empathy it’s not going to be all smiles but it’s worth it in the end. You’re going to put a guy on a pedestal and after a few years you’re going to realise that you have to be your own everything and you’re going to make that happen.

You will fall in love again, this time with writing and art and that bond you have, I think, is unbreakable. You will become part of a community full of loving, kind people and you’ll get told that your depressing poetry should be in a book.

There will be bucketloads of drama and tears and confusing emotions and despite what people say the choices you make are not stupid or ruining your life in any way because even though you still have a long way to go,today is the happiest you’ve been in months.

You’ve been through so much but you’ve tried and still are today trying to be a rolemodel and despite everything and all the mistakes you make and will continue to make , you are an inspiration and not just to the amazing people who read Seventeen Wishes but to me as well.

To the lost little girl that was me. You are the badassiest,bravest, most beautifully fierce individual in the whole damn world.

Start believing it.

Something will grow through what you are going through and it will be you.

xxxChips

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How to Set, Plan and Slay Your Goals in 2018

How to Set, Plan and Slay Your Goals in 2018

So I’m gonna soldier talk you through this.That’s my way of saying “Find yourself a notebook badasses of the world I’m about to teach you everything you need to know about goal-setting, planning in the correct way to achieve your goals and how to FINALLY ACHIEVE whatever it is that you have your heart set on for the upcoming new year.”

So the best way to explain this is to add in all the goals I have for myself. Also before we start here are a few things you are going to need:

Tools

  • Pens
  • Highlighters(optional)
  • Paper//Notebook
  • Ruler

Step 1:Create Categories

So before we even start thinking about what we want to achieve we’re gonna make 4-5 main categories which our goals will fall under.

-SCHOOL

-CAREER

-HEALTH

-SELF DEVELOPMENT

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I find that pretty much all my goals fit into the four categories but if you want to add more, feel free. Make sure that you don’t have too many categories or it can get very stressful and overwhelming.

Step 2:Brainstorm

What are your goals? These can be about anything. Do you wanna go to gym everyday or smile more? This is the time for you to figure out what all the random goals you want to achieve are.

Write them all down, no matter how weird they may seem.

New friends           80% average                              Workout everyday          Smile more

         Six pack       Stress-free                Write book                                        Inspire people

Step 3:Organise them into categories

*Make sure that you only have 3 or four goals under each category*

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School

  • New friends
  • 80% average
  • No stress

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Health

  • Workout everyday
  • Stay fit
  • Six pack
  • Go to the gym once a week

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Self- Development

  • Laugh louder+more often
  • Be happy
  • Read more self-help books
  • Meditate

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Career

Blogging

  • Post twice a week
  • Inspire young girls to live life the way they want and encourage them to shatter all the glass ceilings they want.
  • Teach girls less about fitting into glass slippers and more about shattering glass ceilings-UNKOWN

  • Make blogger friends

YouTube

  • Start the damn thing hehe
  • Post once a week
  • Have fun
  • Inspire 13 year old girls going through ish and people of other ages obvi

Okay, so now that  you’ve created the goals you want to achieve, you need a step-by-step action plan in order to achieve them.

So what you’re gonna do is look at each category, let’s start with School.You’ll notice how the bullet points fit into one another.If I’m getting good grades and have friends then I would be stress free. Let’s say I am stressed though, being around friends is always a great way to relieve stress.

Now we’re gonna make a few little notes under each goal about what you need to do to achieve the goal.If you feel the need to go into more detail about what you need to do for this goal to become an actuality then I would use a page per goal.

~The notes under the goal will be about all the little things you need to do, be it changing habits, or making new ones.

EXAMPLE

School Goals-Plan

80% Average

—Take notes in class (so I keep up and don’t have to stress at the end of each term) Cough cough, now where have I heard the word stress before?Take note of the sarcasm.

—Pay attention in class

—Keep up-to-date on homework

New Friends

—Be friendly

—Don’t gossip

—Reach out to people you wanna be friends with

Stress-Free

—Meditate

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YAYY!!I’m so proud of you for even coming this far.The steps you’ve taken so far will have made sure the goals you’re setting are valid and things you really want for yourself; not just something you thought of in the spur of the moment.You’ve made it this far:You know exactly what it is that you want, you have a plan and an excellent post bursting full of any motivation you lack.You have all the tools you could possibly need, so what are you waiting for?

Before you leave I want to leave a few tips to help you stay ontrack with your goals.

  1. BE SPECIFIC ABOUT YOUR GOALS-what exactly do you want?how will you get there?
  2. TRY NOT TO INCLUDE TOO MANY NUMBERS-you are not a number.your happiness should not depend on a number
  3. SET REMINDERS ON YOUR PHONE ABOUT YOUR GOALS-the number of times I’ve forgotten about goals #the struggle
  4. REVIEW YOUR GOALS EVERY TWO WEEKS-this is to make sure you’re making progress with your goals regularly
  5. DON’T FEEL DOWN IF YOU DON’T ACHIEVE A GOAL-knowing that you worked hard to get there is all that matters

 

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What are your goals for 2018?What goals did you achieve this year?What keeps you ontrack with your goals?

~I WILL MAKE YOU BELIEVE YOU ARE LOVELY~

xxxChips

5 Steps To Happiness–Everything I’m Saying Goodbye To At The End Of 2017

5 Steps To Happiness–Everything I’m Saying Goodbye To At The End Of 2017

Hey everyone

I hope you’re all having an amazing day

So today’s post is about being happy and how you can make 2018 a happier year for you. These are a few things that I’m saying bye to because I want to be a happier person, and I think that hearing this and thinking about how it relates to you might help you aswell.

-Forget expectations

I’ve spent the past two years listening. Listening to people go on and on about how I’m too ‘unladylike’; listening to people say untrue things about me and judging me.Nobody has ever been afraid to share their opinions about me, please don’t pity me because I really don’t care about what they think😂The hardest thing about growing up is that you’re supposed to figure out who you are. It’s hard enough with social media but even harder when everyone wants to share their own peanut gallery of thoughts about your life.Tbh I’ve never cared about expectations so why would I start now?

-Friends

Recently I said bye to one of my best friends.And no he isn’t dead.We’ve been friends for roughly two years now.We told each other everything, he was the first person to message me after a panic attack and make sure I was okay and the only person I wanted to rant about Shooter with.He was the first guy I genuinely cared about.When we decided it was better if weren’t friend a anymore it kinda broke me.Our friendship had been and always will be one of the best thing that ever happened to me and even though I wasn’t ready to say goodbye.It was time. I still miss him. I mean if you were trying not to have a panic attack while listening to Marvin’s Room you’d understand that better.What I’m trying to remember through all of this is that even though I’ve had to say goodbye to friends I love, true friendships will always withstand time and distance.

As for the fake ones? I handled them a loooong time ago.

sassy beyonce GIF

-Stop Holding On To The Past

It’s never easy to let go of the past because it’s what makes you you.You need to understand that whatever happened, whatever memory you’re trying to hold on to, is always gonna be there. Holding on to the past is only stopping you from living in the moment, from creating more amazing memories that you’re gonna look back on and smile about.
Goodbye past, I’ll be sure to visit soon.

-Comparison

You will always live in someone’s shadow if you constantly compare yourself to others. You are your own person. What good will pointing out how Sarah has longer, better looking eyelashes and higher cheekbones do?The first step to getting rid of comparison in your life is self-acceptance.Once you’re more than comfortable in your own skin you can truly start living the girl boss life you want for yourself.
Goodbye comparison you sure weren’t fun and you sure as hell won’t be missed.

-Fearing judgement

Fear can prevent you doing a lot of amazing things. In You Are A Badass, Jen refers to fear as the Big Snooze or BS for short.She’s completely right, fear is pressing the snooze button on all your dreams, It’s stopping you from achieving everything you have ever wanted to achieve.So I’m gonna challenge you to challenge one of your fears in 2018, do something you’ve never done before because you were scared.

 

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“And so together they built a life they loved”
xxxChips

 

THIS LEFT ME SHOOKETH.

READ THIS LIKE NOW!!! IT’S SUPER IMPORTANT AND IT DESERVES TO BE SHARED, YOU DO NOT NEED A GUY TO BE HAPPY!! YOU DEFINE YOU!! SO NO, HE DOESN’T GET TO COMPLETE YOU BECAUSE YOU ARE ALREADY WHOLE AND YOU, MY DARLING, ARE FAR MORE THAN ENOUGH!

F*** the notion that you need another human being to be your savior. You have your own precious and beautiful self. I promise you, that’s all you need. You just need you.

via To My Fellow Women, Prince Charming Isn’t Going To Save You — Thought Catalog

 

EXAM MOTIVATION!+A SPECIAL MESSAGE

EXAM MOTIVATION!+A SPECIAL MESSAGE

 AMAZING PHOTO-Sebastian Mantel

So I’ve been really busy studying but I wanted to make this post because I know, I am not the only one and exams are stressful and I believe that if you find the motivation and work hard then there is absolutely nothing stopping you from achieving an A+

THIS PART HERE IS RANDOM:

So, this is kinda related, kinda not, but, anyways, when I’m on Pinterest and I see all these “perfect” study notes it discourages me because my notes don’t ever look like this

pinterest: bellaxlovee ✧☾                                                                                                                                                                                 More

They look like this:

(PS: soz for the camera quality)

So on Pinterest I have this board Studyblr and it’s a lot more sorta realistic in terms of me and how I study, Hmm did that make sense?? But yeah, because this post is pretty short, if you want more then,I would definitely recommend that.

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This is extremely weird because I’m putting my ending up here, lol, but anyways. I just want you guys to remember that exams are hard. That’s a fact. But now, isn’t the time to give up. If you give up now, all those hours making study notes, getting your friends to test you, late night homework: that’s all for nothing. You guys cannot give up no matter what happens. I know you can’t wait for the year/term/semester to be over so you can relax but I promise you guys that if you work hard now and you study and you try your best that is the only thing that matters. And there is no better feeling in the world than knowing you tried hard and seeing amazing results, or proving everyone who doubted you wrong. And I really, really, really want you guys to do well and even if you don’t you have come so bloody far and I am soo proud of you even if you aren’t.

xxxChips

Things can change

Okay so that’s enough of that, now for what you’re really here for:

 MOTIVATION

DORM ROOM INSPIRATION. The small mess on the bed itself is what I am looking for, but everywhere. It feels crammed, and I want it that way.

No one studies quite like Rory Gilmore.
Coffee Study Sleep Repeat

pinterest: bellaxlovee ✧☾   ••pinterest: brazenblog••

Cork Board Ideas

study motivation  motivation and study  Instagram: @_futuredoctor

HOW TO SLAYY THE NEW YEAR//2018 Girlboss Guide

HOW TO SLAYY THE NEW YEAR//2018 Girlboss Guide

Heyy fam❤️❤️

 Let’s face it. 2017 could best be described as the struggle between blogging, YouTube, Twitter, Instagram, Pinterest and socializing.There really wasn’t much time to get all that done and fit in time to study for exams and make study notes.

Obviously you’re gonna let school work be a priority but we all get de-motivated and procrastinate or make notes and don’t study from them.

ORGANISATION

1.PLAN

This is the first step because this stage can make it break you. I find that writing a to-do list is always the best way to start off a productive day. Knowing that you have a set plan of what you want to achieve is only gonna make you want to get it all done.

2.HAVE A GOAL

What’s the point of doing anything if you don’t have a goal? A goal is gonna push you towards working harder for your dreams,no matter how far away it may seem.My whole thing is that I wanna inspire people. And I wanna pass math because I wanna get away from school and watch Netflix and travel and blog without any distractions.

3.HAVE A GOOD VIBES 

If I go to school, unhappy about learning or listening in class, it’s gonna be really hard for me to actually get stuff done when the time comes. I love school don’t get me wrong, but I don’t love it because of work or anything, I love it because I get to see my friends. Knowing that in 10 minutes the bell is gonna ring and I can hang with my friends, is one of the only reasons I bother in NS😂

4.SIT NEAR THE FRONT

Knowing that at any second a teacher is gonna catch you talking is a great way to get you to focus, lol. But it’s been scientifically proven that if you sit in the front, your teacher just assumes that you are one of “those” students.

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5.ASK QUESTIONS

Not only will it make it seem like you care about learning the stuff, but it’ll help you understand and remember the topic better. Never be too afraid to ask questions, because trust me, when you know the answer to that question in the exam and everyone’s sitting there clueless, you won’t regret asking.

6.TAKE NOTES

I’m one of those people who always seems to have their life together but like, in reality is such a mess. And like, the only reason that happens is because I spent a year watching organisation YouTube videos for fun. Honestly still obsessed with them but, the one major thing I learnt from them is that it’s important to make notes as you learn about the stuff and not wait till two days before the exam to do them. I obviously, being me, didn’t make notes throughout the year for all of my subjects. But for the really content-heavy stuff like EMS, History and NS I did, and that saved me so much time. Because when everyone got their study notes they had to do everything and I was having such a joll because I’d done over half of it.

Also these aren’t my study notes because I’m on holiday in Australia and I don’t need them so I left them at hometumblr_nmirfudga81u9hg3jo1_1280-1.jpg

HACKS

THE TEDDY BEAR METHOD4857d2f92eca6c6a28ea51783fcd74dc7b0ed4ed_hq.jpg How it works: You place gummy bears or any other sweet of your choice at the end of every paragraph.When you’re studying the information, as soon as you’ve studied a section and reached a gummy bear you get to eat it.

THE TEXTBOOK METHOD

How it works: You read through a page in your textbook once or twice, close it and quickly write down everything you remember.You then, re-open the textbook and add the bits of info you forgot in a different colour.

THE 3 DIFFERENT TYPES OF LEARNERS

Finding out which type of learner you are can help you find the study methods that work best for you.I’m a visual and auditory learner, mostly visual.So I’m gonna break it down so it looks aesthetically pleasing and isn’t just a bland paragraph looking thing. What am I even saying 😂😂

Visual learner

  • Learns best by seeing things
  • Flashcards, colour, diagrams, charts

Kinesthetic learner

  • Learns best by movement
  • Walk around while revising, use games or activities to help you remember,toss a tennis ball around while studying

Auditory Learner

  • Learns best by hearing
  • Study groups, reading aloud, videos,recording yourself and playing it back

NOTE TAKING There are so many different ways to go when it comes to making study notes: flashcards, mind maps, bullet pointing

So this is the Cornell Note Taking technique, the thing I love the most about this, is how visually appealing it is.I tried it for a bit and I loved it so much and then I lost my ruler so😂

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PS:If you wanna see more ways of taking notes comment the word “blue” down below

img_0602-1How long do you study for? Favourite subject? Would you like to see a part 2? Are you following my socials? What type of learner are you??

xxxChips

Never stop dreaming